Aug 28, 2004

Clerks 2: Electric Bugaloo!

Or rather, Passion of the Clerks. That's right, the viewaskewniverse isnt completely done with its story:

"The writer-director of "Dogma," "Chasing Amy" and "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" told the Associated Press on Friday that he has begun work on a sequel to "Clerks," his homemade indie classic from 1994.

That $27,000 movie, shot at night in a store where Smith worked, chronicled the adventures of Dante and Randal, two guys who talk about life, death, sex and movies while working at neighboring stores.

The sequel picks up 10 years later.

"It's about what happens when that lazy, 20-something malaise lasts into your 30s. Those dudes are kind of still mired, not in that same exact situation, but in a place where it's time to actually grow up and do something more than just sit around and dissect pop culture and talk about sex," Smith said during an interview at his Hollywood office. "It's: What happened to these dudes?" "

Read the rest at

Aug 26, 2004

Ahoy-matey v3.0 is back up and running, and on more stable servers. So check it out! Plus we are only three weeks from Pirate Night 2004! Invitations will be going out soon!

Republicans and Naked Boys!

It doesn't get much funnier than this:

"The Statue of Liberty. Bloomingdale's. The Brooklyn Botanical Gardens. A stage full of naked guys singing. Oops! The city's tourist bureau has pulled an off-Broadway show called ``Naked Boys Singing'' from a list of discounted offerings to visiting Republican delegates, after the Republican National Committee complained it wasn't suitable." Read the whole sordid story here.

Aug 22, 2004

Site downtime is currently down, as I transfer it from dotster to canaca. In the meantime, go outside and enjoy the pretty evening. Happy 21st to my JBird!

Aug 21, 2004

Crappy Singer Deathmatch

To Quote the character from office space: "Why do I have to change my name, he's that one thats sucks." Here's a little Get Fuzzy for your weekend:

Aug 20, 2004

Ahoy-matey v3.0

A lot is going on at! Click here to try out the new version! Also, I'm in the process of transferring the domain to new servers, so there might be some downtime. Be patient and soon we'll be running better than ever.

Aug 19, 2004

Dogs Not playing Poker?

A silly article from a silly site:

Scientists Debunk Popular Painting: "Dogs Can't Play Poker."

'After years of comprehensive studies involving thousands of canines, scientists at the renowned Arkansas Canis Familiaris Research Foundation have concluded that dogs cannot play poker. "Despite the proliferation of the popular painting "A Night Of Poker," which depicts several dogs sitting around a table playing poker, it's impossible for dogs to engage in such activities," the foundation stated in a prepared release." full story from

Aug 18, 2004

Go Nationalism!

We're finally ahead in the medal count! China still has a couple golds over us, but we have the most overall! Check for up-to-date numbers.

Aug 17, 2004

Dumbest thing of the week

Here's the dumbest line in music I've heard recently (and it's even in a song I like)

"In the wilderness, the only place to find freedom is in the dictionary, under 'f'." - Matthew Good, "Alert Status Red"

What the hell does that mean?

Aug 12, 2004

New Top Ten (Minus 5)

I’m back with another exciting “top ten” list and his time I’ll be counting down the ten best pirates in movies over the years (and by years I mean ones I’ve seen). Oh and by ten, I mean five. I decided to do five, because, well, I didn’t want to think of ten. Aside from being a pirate I also happen to be lazy. So here we go:

5. Name: Sloth
Movie: The Goonies
Actor: John Matuszak
Quote: “Hey, you guys!”
List-worthiness: You don’t see a whole lot of pirating from the Goonies’ lovable mutant, but Sloth is a true pirate at heart, complete with a treasure chest and pirate ship in the end!

4. Name: Captain Hook
Movie: Hook
Actor: Dustin Hoffman
Quote: “To a ten-year-old I'm huge.”
List-worthiness: I almost didn’t include Hook because I wanted to add Bob Hoskins’ Smee, but then I remembered he did the Mario Bros. movie and that automatically disqualifies someone from making this list ever. I really like Hook, despite the fact I had to watch it everyday one summer with my cousins. It’s such a neat take on the Peter Pan mythos and Dustin Hoffman fit very well into it.

3. Name: Dread Pirate Roberts aka the Man in Black aka Westley
Movie: The Princess Bride
Actor: Cary Elwes
Quotes: “There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.” “Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”
List-worthiness: The Princess Bride may be the perfect movie. I mean, when you think about it, it’s a chick flick, but you can’t help getting caught up in its magic. Cary Elwes is awesome in the lead role, and Mandy Patinkin gets points for be the probable future Dread Pirate Roberts.

2. Name: Captain Jack Sparrow
Movie: Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
Actor: Johnny Depp
Quotes: “I think we've all arrived at a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically.” “You need to find yourself a girl mate. Or perhaps the reason you practice three hours a day is that you already found one, and are otherwise incapable of wooing said strumpet. You're not a eunuch are you?” “You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?”
List-worthiness: I don’t need to explain why Johnny Depp is on this list. What you may want to know is why he didn’t make number one. That’s because the greatest movie pirate in the world is in a movie you probably never saw:

1. Name: Yellowbeard
Movie: Yellowbeard
Actor: Graham Chapman
Quotes: “She couldn't be your mother. No woman ever slept with me and lived.” “Fruit of me loins? I haven't got fruit in me loins! Lice, yes, and proud of 'em, but no fruit!”
List-worthiness: The greatest pirate and the greatest pirate movie of all time. Take the comic genius of Monty Python, specifically the late Graham Chapman (with appearances by Eric Idle and John Cleese), and the zaniness of Cheech and Chong, and that weird priest from the Princess bride and you get the only movie that can successfully make multiple jokes about rape and urinating on imported hedges. Hopefully this gem will make its way onto DVD, because it is a must see for all pirate fans.

Windows Parody

The parody Bill Gates doesn't want you to see!

Windows XP Version 19.914

Check this out, there's some hilarious stuff there.

Music Du Jour

I've gotten my grubby little hands on some great CD's lately; here's some stuff to check out:

Modest Mouse: Good News for People Who Like Bad News
Rancid: Indestructible
JET: Get Born

Aug 4, 2004

Political Compass

Find out where you rank on the political spectrum, just click here. Its a decent 6 page survey, that rates your ideological platform from left to right and from authoritative to libertarian. Check the link out, then come back here and post how you stand. Here's mine:

Economic Left/Right: -4.62
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -4.31

I'm kind of suprised I came off as left of center as i did - the closest political figures to me are nelson mandela and the dalai lama, thats not too bad company, eh?

Cancelled on Penn

Live on Penn has been cancelled for the rest of the season! Here's what the website says:

"It is with much regret that we have to inform you that the remainder of the Live on Penn concert series has been cancelled effective immediately. We had hoped to once again bring the people of D.C. first-rate entertainment at reasonable prices all summer long. Unfortunately, the series is no longer viable. We want to thank our sponsors, partners, volunteers and the live music fans of Washington who truly supported this series. For those who purchased advanced tickets, information on refunds will be forthcoming in the near future."

Not viable? What does that mean? I suspect maybe it has to do with the terror alert, and rising costs of security. (Putting DC on code orange costs over a million dollars a day). Hopefully LoP is not gone forever, as its been a really fun event last summer and what little of this summer we had it. If anyone has more info as to why it was cancelled, let me know, via email or comment. - check this out, read the news, and go vote!

Aug 2, 2004

Dwain's getting old: the weekend!

So I had an action packed weekend, between a good friend's wedding and my 5 year high school reunion. Between both events, I'd say I played flip cup with the most ecletic group EVER. I got to see a lot of neat people I'd lost track of which was great.

Play "peasant quest" on - > especially if you loved the old kings quest games by roberta williams. Great stuff! Best command ever: USE BABY!